Thirty, Thriving, Therapy, and Other Things (like taxes)
Fast forward to February 12, 2023. #Thirty
If you read my birthday post last year, then you know I hardly ever know what I’m doing on my special day. By nature, it always happens in a spontaneous kind of way.
This year was no different, even though I tried my hardest to plan. (When are we going to learn about making plans?)
I knew I wanted to celebrate by having a big party. For context, I had an epic Mardi Gras themed party when I was 16. This was back when “My Super Sweet 16,” was a popular show on MTV. That party catapulted me into event production, my signature.
I started looking at places to have the party in my hometown. Almost every building I found gave…church, wedding, rustic, or dark and crusty. The one venue I absolutely loved was booked for the weekend, but giving discrimination vibes anyway. 🙄
I remember feeling so discouraged throughout the process. I am an aesthetics kind of girl. If I can’t see myself or the vision in the space, then I generally don’t want to do it. It’s called taste! Plus, this was my way of soft-launching my soon-come event production services.
I moved on and started thinking of other ways to celebrate, but I also knew I didn’t want to spend my big day alone. I am always spending time with myself. Last year’s solo trip was amazing, but I wanted my people there with me this time. This was a milestone.
‘Champagne Dreams’ by William Robinson Photog.
Keep Celebrating Yourself
It was [once again] too late to plan a random vacation in February and expect people to come. I was slick running out of options. The only thing I had planned was a 30th birthday photoshoot, which also came together in the 12th hour.
After a few months of searching for the “perfect” venue with no luck, I neglected the party idea. Then, literally a week before my birthday, as I was leaving the photoshoot, something said: “Keep celebrating yourself.”
My birthday was the day of Rihanna’s concert featuring the Superbowl—a Sunday. I was sure people already had plans, but at that point, it wasn’t about other people or RiRi (love you girl). It was about me, what I wanted to do, and how I wanted to feel.
One of the key messages I shared from my solo retreat was: Don't wait on others to celebrate life.
I had to live by that.
Birthday Cake by Cookies, Cakes & Beyond of Hattiesburg, MS
Me + *some of the crew posted up at the party ❤️
Love Love Love
I’m so happy I decided (at the last minute) to celebrate. I had a self-love Valentine’s themed Day party - so appropriate. It was at the most modern [wedding] venue I could find.
Not everyone I love was able to attend, but attendees were lit and matched my energy. There was most definitely an abundance of love in the air.
Love and love potions; the drinks were hitting.
Nothing about that day happened the way I envisioned it 4 months prior, but it was still so special. I think that was the message. At least, it’s what I held onto.
I walked into year 30 carefree, yet feeling all of my feelings. Later that night, I hit a pothole (I think) and blew my whole tire. Absolutely cried myself to sleep about that one. On my birthday, @God?!
The next day, I woke up to red and pink latex (not that kind but I wish…ha). My aunts had stuffed the party’s heart-shaped balloon arch in my room. I couldn’t help but to smile at the gesture.
I got up to read the hilarious love letters and cards I received at the party. After crying happy tears this time, I pulled out a chunk of birthday cash (thanks everyone) and was off to buy a new tire and rim.
The duality of being an adult!
I was thankful to even have money to handle that situation so quickly. There have been times where that would have set me back in more ways than one.
Life at Thirty
Six months in, this new decade already feels different. I love that for me. I spent a lot of my 20s planning life—it was exhausting.
I recently started therapy. Doing that and getting to the root cause is important to me. No shame. 10/10, highly recommend it. Throughout the process, I’ve been giving myself the grace and freedom to show up solely as me. I’ve stepped back into building my media and production company after having to press pause on it. I’ve been actively pursuing spaces where I can connect with others. I’ve been choosing me.
I’m telling you…the way you start your birthdays matter. Those experiences can trickle over into the rest of your year.
‘Editor in Chief’ by William Robinson Photography
Since my imperfect celebration, I have been delivered from my own plans and expectations. “It ain’t perfect, but everything’s beautiful here.”
I hardly question myself. I don’t fight as much with my gifts, my body, or my feelings. Thirty has been all about ease. I love it here. I love everything except taxes. Now, that’s another story.
And Other Things
As I grow through life, I hope to share more adventures and revelations from my experience. I’m not promising to update this blog every week. Knowing me, it could very well be another year before you read another post. Let’s hope not.
I will say that I am back in a state of effortless flow, or back in my bag as US young folks say. ;) That’s where year 30 has me - not giving up on the easy things I tend to make harder.
Even with this blog, I’ve accepted: Sun + Day is about embracing imperfection and ease. Unlike other areas where I am seemingly sure, I don’t always have the answers here. I don’t always know where this is going.
That’s cool.
I do know that this is a home for the unapologetic; the human side; the growing pains; the fun moments in between. It’s absolutely a space created just for me, but I hope you’ll continue to read and grow along.
CHEERS 🥂
…to new seasons and more reasons to be ourselves.
Cheers to celebrating life. Cheers to letting go of what has weighed us down. May we be light, free, and forever fly. 💁🏽♀️
Until the next Sunday,
Day
Up Next: More Letting Go: What a Weekend in LA Taught Me + The Perfect LA Vacation Itinerary
