Keep on Dreaming: Notes from My Solo Birthday Retreat at Chateau Elan
This year, like most, I had no idea what I was doing for my birthday. It wasn’t until the week before that things came together, and quite naturally. It was spur of the moment. In true Aquarius fashion.
I discovered Chateau Elan via IG. A fellow writer and Aquarius, @WriteonKiah, shared a blog post reflecting on her own solo birthday retreat at the resort. Reading her post influenced and confirmed my decision to also spend my special weekend in a lap of luxury and wellness.
The celebratory getaway was long overdue. For my 29th, I felt like I needed to champion myself again. I had been through some tough times—feeling stuck in my 20-somethings, navigating post-grad life and struggling with the impact of a 2-year pandemic. Ya girl needed a break!
I was more than ready to tap in and enjoy my own company in a place that felt luxurious and calm. This retreat was also a way to honor my growth, milestones reached, and the wisdom I’ve gained from mistakes and personal sacrifices. I deserved it. I earned it.
Friday morning, I made my way to Braselton, GA, where the winery and resort sits on 3500+ acres of rolling hills and surrounding forests. Once I made it to Atlanta, it was just another 45 minute drive north. I never pictured myself spending my birthday anywhere in Georgia, outside of ATL, but I had the most amazing time. And I did it all solo.
I want to share more from my experience and hopefully inspire you to celebrate yourself, whether it’s your birthday or not. Here are some stories, notes, and takeaways from my solo birthday retreat at Chateau Elan.
Don’t Wait on Others to Celebrate Life
Kiah touched on this in her blog post, but I’ll elaborate on how important it is. A lot of people, both before and during my stay asked me questions like: “Who are you going with?” “Is it just you?” “Are you here by yourself?”
To preface - I am not the person who minds going places alone. In fact, I don’t think it should be so taboo. I didn’t realize how big of a deal this was as I hardly ever think twice about being a party of one and rolling solo.
While I’m all about enjoying your people, I’m also for enjoying yourself. I had waited too late to invite any friends, but that wasn’t going to stop me from going. I think a lot of people can be guilty of waiting on others to validate or approve of their decisions, experiences, wants, and needs.
To that, I say: Don’t wait on others to celebrate life. If there’s something you want, have at it, go do it—even if you have to do it alone. Your life is yours to create. Enjoy it.
Chateau Elan Wine Tasting Room
Spending Time with Yourself is Empowering
I feel empowered spending time with myself, especially if it’s a new experience or something out of the ordinary. For this retreat, I was on my own time. I did what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. I ate the things I like to eat. I wore what I wanted. I blasted my favorite songs and danced the night away in my room. I gave myself space + time to be still and work through whatever was on my mind. I watched Shrek and Spongebob before bed because that’s just who I am.
You’re never really alone.
Spending time with myself often teaches me more about what I like and what I don’t. I can (respectfully) be unconcerned with accommodating others or giving away and depleting my energy. I can do me without thinking about how it may be perceived.
At the resort, there were several people who approached me to share kind words, complimenting me on my style and confidence. To this I replied, “Thank you. I’m working on it.” I had to ensure a drunken woman that while I was alone, I didn’t feel alone. Again, I didn’t think of this as some big declaration. I was just happy to be there.
While at dinner, I ordered all the things I wanted to sample without shame. I propped my phone up and caught up on the hilariousness that is Abbott Elementary while indulging in a 5-star meal and fine dining. Sometimes, I would just sit at the table, enjoying the atmosphere and taking it all in. It’s only awkward if you make it. There are plenty of things you can do to help pass the time.
Marc Restaurant at Chateau Elan
You’ll Meet New People
One thing I am learning is: It’s important to allow others who don’t know you the opportunity to get to know you. Or at least as much as you’re willing to share. (Be careful. I’m a ‘safety first’ advocate.) Feel it out.
You may share a moment with someone that sparks the conversation you never knew you needed. You might find your soulmate or a new friend.
While that wasn’t the case nor the intention for me, I definitely found myself having conversations with strangers who I now know their names. That can be an inspiring or rewarding surprise. It can also make you feel less alone if that’s a concern. No one is going to overlook you if you’re by yourself. If anything, I found that it made me stand out more.
Be Responsible, Safe and Aware
With that being said, I’m adding this point because I think it’s worth mentioning, especially if you’re a lady. I consider myself to be pretty responsible, safe and aware. Even though this was a last minute trip, I had an agent to help me coordinate it. This had a lot to do with safety as much as it did convenience. I wanted the resort staff to be aware of the fact that I was there and someone else (an agency) knew about it. While I wasn’t telling everyone I was rolling solo, those who needed to know, knew.
I also didn’t disclose too many details on my location via social media until I got back home safe. I took other methods of precautions like riding the resort shuttles at night; and I didn’t venture too far off alone during the day. Though, I may have been right at my limit, I never exceeded it. I’m not a big drinker, but it can be a slippery slope with the winery and bars. I was sure to sip slowly. Because of my own measures and precautions, I never felt unsafe. One of my daily affirmations is “I am protected,” so I knew I was good.
Keep on Dreaming, Inspiration is Everywhere
On my final day at the resort, my mind, body, and soul felt refreshed and rejuvenated. The night before, on my actual birthday, I hung out at Louis House of Bourbon. I walked in to a live rendition of the Isley Brothers and a Black couple stealing the show with their romantic two-step. I met two white couples who encouraged me to play pool with them. Even though I’m not the best at it, I managed to knock in the twelve ball—an almost impossible and impressive shot. It was the shock and synchronicity of it all to do it on my birthday (February 12). In the end, my newfound teammates and I won the eight-ball game courtesy of a “lucky shot” made by yours truly. *Cue Space Age Pimpin’*
After the bar, I went back to my room to unwind. I had a lot of energy on me that wasn’t bad, but that I was ready to release. To my surprise, I ended up falling asleep in my birthday dress. 😳 Usually I would be uncomfortable and upset, but all I could do was smile when I woke up from the unexpected snooze. I had a great time. It was certainly one for the books.
I got up to thoroughly detox myself, shower, get dressed and pack slowly, but carefully as checkout was Sunday at 11:00 am. My only regret is that I didn’t request an extension on the time. Later, I found out from the sweetest Bellman who took major care of me and Guest Services that I could’ve slept in if I needed to. They were in no rush for me to leave.
Wise word from my mama: ALWAYS ASK!
Brunch at Fleur de Lis
After checkout, I drove down to the resort’s spa for brunch. The club soda I drank helped ease any remnants from the night before. And the Breakfast Platter came right on time. Two organic eggs, not your average turkey bacon, grits, a side of fruit + the views from my massive window seat brought on the ultimate zen. I definitely needed the shake back.
I took a hibiscus tea to go and sat in the lobby to digest everything. It had gotten colder outside, so I was happy to enjoy the fireplace and cozy interior before saying goodbye.
Spa at Chateau Elan
On the couch, I gave myself 30 minutes to explore the magazines. To know me is to know: my love for print media and magazines is infinite.
This was surely the icing on the cake; and the fact that they had a tucked copy of Harper’s Bazaar Icon Issue featuring Beyonce was *chef’s kiss.
Before I knew it, I was turning pages and the allotted 30 minutes turned into another hour.
Of course, I had previously read the interview and saw the photos online. So, the content in itself was no shock. Seeing it in real life did however, help me reignite my love for storytelling, typography, photography, art and design.
Keep on Dreaming.
I picked up a quote that has since stuck with me like a new mantra: “Keep on Dreaming.” I knew this subtle message was from a Source far greater than Beyoncé in Harper’s Bazaar. It was the gentle reminder I needed before leaping into the last year of my 20s. This whole experience was. Excerpt:
“I have learned that I have to keep on dreaming. One of my favorite quotes is from the inventor Charles Kettering. It goes “Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.”
I want to show that you can have fun and have purpose, be respectful and speak your mind. You can be both elegant and a provocateur. You can be curvy and still be a fashion icon. I wish this freedom for every person. I have paid my dues and followed every rule for decades, so now I can break the rules that need to be broken. My wish for the future is to continue to do everything everyone thinks I can’t do.” - Beyoncé via Harper’s Bazaar Icon Issue
Shortly after, I decided it was time to finally make myself leave the resort. I had gotten all the energy I came for and more. On my way out, I stopped at the aromatherapy shop to browse because what’s a trip without a souvenir, right?
I thought of all the things I could buy my loved ones. Then, my brain stopped to remind me that this was my birthday. The present was from me to me.
I picked up a fragrance called Sun. The name drew me in and it had a bright aroma to follow. It was the perfect finishing spray on my “Wine Fine 29” at Chateau Elan.
Relationships Matter
One reason I love solo adventures and experiences is because I get to come back better, inspired with something to share. By spending time with myself, I reflected on my life, what more I want out of it + the relationships that mean most to me. Those I am so thankful for. The best part about the retreat is knowing the next time I go back, I’m bringing my girls, my guys, my loves, and all those who love me.
Let the celebrations continue.
Cheers to a year of wellness, luxury, love, and light. Cheers to me & you. Salud! 🥂
Until next time,
+Day
To see more BTS and a photo diary from my experience, request access via Instagram - @sunplusday. Thanks for reading. :)
